You're Not Stupid Because You Want Your Marriage to Work
When Sanballat heard that we were rebuilding the wall he exploded in anger, vilifying the Jews. In the company of his Samaritan cronies and military he let loose: “What are these miserable Jews doing? Do they think they can get everything back to normal overnight? Make building stones out of make-believe?” At his side, Tobiah the Ammonite jumped in and said, “That’s right! What do they think they’re building? Why, if a fox climbed that wall, it would fall to pieces under his weight.”
-Nehemiah 4: 1 - 3 (MSG)
You aren't stupid because you want your marriage to work.
You aren't a fool because you have prayed for it to be successful.
You haven't been taken advantage of because you stayed when others said you should go.
I need to make that clear to someone today. There is nothing wrong with you because you want the marriage that you had - the passion that you had, the friendship that you had, the feelings that you had. God designed marriage to work, whether you are seeing that right now or not, and it is not foolish for you to want what He designed.
Silence that voice that is saying that to you - whether it is your voice or someone that you consider a friend.
It's not foolish to put your marriage in His hands.
It's not stupid to pray for God to redeem and restore what looks lost and broken.
It's not dumb to believe that God can do the impossible in you AND in your spouse.
Even when it looks dumb to others. Even when others tell you what they would do "if they were you" (they aren't you, and they really don't know what they would do in your situation). Here is my encouragement for you today: take the time to hear God.
Fighting for a marriage that is strained is hard work. It's foolish to think that it is not, but it is doable. Much like Nehemiah trying to rebuild a wall that had been pretty much destroyed. It takes effort...lots of it, and there will be opposition. Sometimes that opposition is your own voice. Sometimes it's an external one, but either way, you have to silence that voice and keep on building.
When the voice says that what you are trying to build is impossible or will never be able to stand, you must keep on building, and with God on your side you can.
Talk more to God and less to people, and no matter how it works out, you will be at peace.
You aren't stupid because you want your marriage to work. You are a woman who is standing on faith when it really feels like there is nothing left to stand on. You are a woman who is clinging to God even when she can't cling to her husband. You are a woman who knows that the same God who opened blinded eyes, raised the dead, and saved all of mankind can do that - work the miraculous - in your marriage. You are a believing wife!