Go Back!

The Angel of the Lord said to her, “Return to your mistress, and submit yourself under her hand.” Then the Angel of the Lord said to her, “I will multiply your descendants exceedingly, so that they shall not be counted for multitude.” 

Genesis 16: 9-10

I left my position. No one took it from me. I willingly left it.


It's been years ago now, but there was a time in my life that being a wife was not my top priority. It's painful to admit now, but it is true. I let the position of wife come in second, third, (or sixth) to the other roles in my life.

I was "super" minister at church: I attended nearly every event. I was the church administrator, pastor's assistant, praise team member (and at one time leader), and even Chief Operations Officer. I taught children's church and was a part of several committees.

I was "super" teacher at school: I came to work early. I took work home. I served on several committees and lead my team and grade level. I taught the highest level students, and my students did well overall on their assessments.

I was "super" Debra. I went back to graduate school and earned my master's degree. I attended school on nights and weekends while working full-time and serving at church. I had my kids in all sorts of activities and sports; I made their performances and meetings.

I was "less than" wife. My husband got what was left of me. In all my deep spirituality, and in all of my helping others, I was neglecting one of the major roles that God has called me to.  I was preaching messages of healing and hope, and my husband was feeling left out and neglected - and it was my fault.

God got my attention, and He began the process of me going back to His original plan. He showed me the error of my ways and how out of order I really was. In the process of putting my life back in order, I have had to say no to things that I would have said yes to. People have not understood and have said some very hurtful things to me because I have chosen my family first. But I will always choose them first.

The changes that I have seen over the years have been worth the pain of the lessons that I had to learn. There are times that I still have to check myself. There are times that John has to check me, but I hear him now - and I respond.

Go back, Dear Sister! Go back, to God's original plan for you as a wife. Just like Hagar had to go back to her role under Abram and Sarai, you have to go back to your role as a wife. That's where the blessing is - in submitting to that role. It's not always easy, and there won't always be applause, but that role is a priority, and God honors it. He will bless you as you obey Him as a wife.


You can't serve at church more than you serve at home. It's out of order. Period. You can't be a better employee or business owner than you are a wife. You can't be a better friend that you are a wife. Period. This is the time to put things in order. If you have placed things before your marriage, repent and get it back in order. This is the year of establishment, and we must start here.

Go back!

If you see that there have been times that you have allowed being a wife to fall in priority leave a comment. I am praying with you!




Debra CheekComment